The Subtle Forms of Bullying: It’s Not Always What We Think

January 14, 2020 Posted by Uncategorized 0 thoughts on “The Subtle Forms of Bullying: It’s Not Always What We Think”

Bullies come in a variety of forms. Some may be outright and in our faces. More common is all the subtle ways some people bully, and being the spiritual, loving folks we are (right?) we often fail to see the behaviors until something blows up in front of our faces.

Many of us have experienced narcissists in our lives. I was married to one and in my corporate sales life, interacted with them. On the surface they are bright, wise, charming and caring which are really adaptation tools. They use their money, their power, their self-righteousness and blatant disregard for anyone other than themselves to say: I have what you don’t and I’m in control. Accountability is always avoided at all costs. Their sense of self is ‘power over’ someone else.

When we look at other more subtle forms of bullying the symptoms are the same though typically masked. These people may seem caring though the mask of ‘caring’ is just that, and exists to get what they want from us: nurturing, admiration, validation, being ‘right’ by making us ‘wrong’, an ego boost. And sometimes it’s spiritual teachers to whom we might give our money.

As we move into this new template we’re now integrating, our original template without distortions, all the ways we give our power to someone or something outside of ourselves is showing up. Depending on where each is in the journey, we are moving into or creating a foundation in Source as Self. Everything in the mirror of our lives shows us our patterns and beliefs. And in the case of believing someone else has something we don’t, whether it’s a teacher or friend, it’s the signal to quiet the mind, connect into Source again, and pull that feeling into your field and body. It’s a signal to dive into what’s at our very core.

I believe the success of some spiritual teachers today is that they present a ‘this is what’s happening’ these next few days, or month. They may offer tools to ‘fix’ us with the promise to override existing beliefs. This makes followers feel safe which can be helpful. Though in many the enslavement program – the magnet that attracts – in the followers is never dissolved. Many never face the deep fear of not being in control and ‘not knowing’, which is the doorway through which we must traverse to be Source as Self and to be embodied. The only GPS we ever need is our own, which is built into our DNA and is always active. Ready or not we are all here to live as Source as Self. A true teacher will celebrate when you face your fears, and walk you through them, beside you. A true teacher will point you back to you and ask: what do you feel is going on? (Because there are a billion different ways to experience these deep shifts.) A true teacher will, without fail, point you back to the Wisdom of You.

Look at the ways you minimize your gifts. Celebrate the wisdom that is you! Look at the ways others treat you and how you treat yourself. Determine if the people in your life are committed to deep embodied application of spiritual wisdom. There’s a lot of fractured folks now. Look at all your interactions … do they nourish you? If not let them go. This is the time when we can accomplish such expansion in our lives, and no one can do it for us. Until we do our own shadow work nothing changes.

When we stop bullying ourselves by believing we are somehow wrong or lacking the pattern is disrupted, the old enslavement program is dissolved, and new people show up who want to play and collaborate as equals. Source as Self is finally able to emerge with its own magnet and plan for your life.